The Schloss-Blog is watching Super Bowl LVIII, reflecting on conspiracy theories and wondering why Republicans worked so hard on a border bill they blocked.
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Just when Nikki Haley had built some momentum, she surrendered it to someone called, "None of These Candidates."
Donald Trump took advantage and questioned where her husband was.
Maybe Donald should look in his own backyard - yo, Donald, where's Melania?
***
Joe Biden apparently said "Mexico" when he meant to say "Egypt."
Biden supposedly said Mitterand instead of Macron.
That's OK though - Trump said they're going to change the name of "Pennsylvania" if he loses.
To what? How about, "Thank You, God, Trump Lost!"
WTF?
Anyway, both of them will soon be 80-somethings.
So, you want one of them to be president or Kamala Harris? Or Vivek Ramaswamy?
Yeah, me neither.
Bob Costas said on "Real Time with Bill Maher" that Trump can't be president and Biden shouldn't be and replacing Biden on the ticket at the national convention would not be a first.
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Kliff Kingsbury will become offensive coordinator for the Washington Redskins - uh, Commanders.
Which means that the Redskins - uh, Commanders - will trade for the No. 1 pick from the Bears (or will they?) so they can take the quarterback that Kingsbury coached in college at USC - 2023 Heisman Trophy winner Caleb Williams.
Kingsbury made a pretty good pro quarterback out of the Cardinals Kyler Murray. Kingsbury groomed a pretty good college quarterback who would become a great pro. You may have heard of him - Patrick Mahomes.
Or, if as reported, the Redskins - uh, Commanders - don't get Williams, will it be because Williams told the Bears he's OK with going to them at No. 1 and playing for their new offensive coordinator. So. do the Bears want the quarterback their head coach and GM selected or the one they were left with - Justin Fields?
If they don't want Fields, who does?
Stay tuned.
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If you believe that Taylor Swift will pop up on the halftime show with Usher because she's there anyway for Travis ... or if you believe she will endorse Biden immediately after the game ... or if you believe that the Chiefs getting to the Super Bowl is a Democratic-led, Deep State-driven plot to get exposure for Swift just before she endorses Biden ... or if you believe that the whole Swift-Kelce romance is a Deep State attempt to get young voters who are football-watching fans to look more favorably at Biden ... or if you believe that Swift and Kelce will announce their engagement after the game and intent to get married at Joe Biden's inauguration ...
... and if you believe all that...
You are a card-carrying QAnon Republican.
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Republicans negotiated a border-security bill for which they'd been clamoring for months.
Then Trump said not to vote for it.
So they didn't.
Assholes.
Republicans have done little in Congress this year besides attempt impeachment and carry out Trump's revenge agenda.
While America suffers.
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Record-setting kick returner Devin Hester and defensive line monster-turned-media personality Steve McMichael will be going to the Pro Football Hall of Fame.
One is a Chicago Bears Super Bowl Champion. The other returned a kick for a touchdown in a losing Super Bowl effort.
Both are deserving, especially the ailing McMichael.
Congrats.
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Good night, Mrs. Calabash. Here's to you, "None of These Candidates."
More Sunday night on my Radio Free Phoenix rock 'n' roll show.
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