Wednesday, December 1, 2021

Men and Women

Today's post, though updated a little, is rerun from a previous Schloss-Blog from so long ago that it wasn't even called the Schloss-Blog back then. The Schloss-Blog is taking the holiday weekend off.

For today, in the spirit of giving thanks, the Schloss-Blog does not have the heart to be political nor cynical (yeah, right). America remains a country marked by violence or Republican calls therefor. We will address that in a later blog post.

Today, let's have some fun, a blast from the past, if you will. The Schloss-Blog returns in its usual form next weekend.

Today's Schloss-Blog is not about politics (OK, a little). But it is about people. Democrats and Republicans. Boys and girls. Men and Women. Remember when we all got along? Laugh with me. Or at me. Your call.

***

Today, we're thinking that woman should be in charge. Of everything. 

Women should rule the world. Why not? They make sense out of everything.

For instance, men wear jeans.

Women wear jeans that fit.

Like, a guy in our line at the grocery store the other day had jeans on - belted - that had slipped below his butt. Fortunately, his boxers hadn't.

When was the last time, or anytime, that you saw a woman in line at the grocery store with her jeans having slipped below her butt?

***

Men, meanwhile, go to the grocery store.

Women go shopping.

Men buy stuff on amazon.

Women look for exactly what they want on amazon dot com. Or Macy's. Or Clinique. Or Target. Or...

***

Men cook dinner.

Women plan a meal.

Men make steaks on the grill.

Women go to the store, pick out steaks, bring them home, defrost them, tenderize them and marinate them.

Men put them on the grill and flip them every 6 minutes.

But the men cooked them, right?

***

Men sweep and vacuum.

Women clean the house.

In its entirety.

Men go to the bathroom for half an hour.

Women take Febreze with them.

***

Men have favorite football teams they would die for.

Women have favorite football teams they live for.

Men have favorite underwear they like.

Women buy them for him.

Men watch TV.

Women watch their favorite shows.

Men vote.

Women research candidates.

Men like to dance.

Women know how to dance.

Men like Saturday Night Live.

Women like Colin Jost.

Smart men get vaccinated.

All women do.

Men run the United States.

It's about time women did.

***

Good night Mr. & Mrs. Calabash. Here's to you Mr. and Mrs. Robinson.

More Sunday Night on my Radio Free Phoenix rock 'n' roll show.

Hope you had a Happy Thanksgiving.


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